Hands in the Face

It's a fun little term my friend and I use to describe mommy overload on days when well, there's just too much going on.

What it looks like:

You see me standing before you and you're talking to me, while my kids are dancing around like banshees or heathens at some sacred ritual, shouting and laughing (or crying and whining), tugging at my arms, or waving some kind of toy around, usually one they don't own yet, and are trying to get me to buy for them.

What it sounds like:

A freight train, a trumpeting herd of elephants, a rock concert, complete with fireworks, and at least one tiny voice--it could be the person speaking to me, or it could just be my own inner self whimpering for help.

What it is:

It's a lot like shell shock--that condition soldiers get when they're in the thick of battle and suddenly it becomes too much. They're standing there, looking around at the carnage; there's probably ringing in their ears, yet they can't hear or at least take in any of the sights and sounds around them. That's Hands In The Face--only without the violence.

How do I deal with it? I shut down. I cancel things, like appointments and play dates. I snap for the kids to pack up and go, no matter where we are. Although sometimes I just stand there, slack jawed and stare for a few minutes, unable to do anything.

So if you see me--or any mom--standing there, slack jawed, not reprimanding her screaming kids, or if she's ignoring you, have a little compassion. We probably have hands in the face.

Cleanse Day 18: I'm Afraid of Food

It's Day 18 and I feel great. I've lost weight and two people have said I look good--healthy glowing skin, and I look 10 years younger. I've enjoyed the yoga and support groups, and especially the 12 meals a week prepared by a chef. I'm really hopeful that I can keep the healthy lifestyle going. But there are only 3 days left of the cleanse.

And I'm afraid of all that food out there in the real world.

First, I'm afraid of coffee. I want coffee. The teas just aren't satisfying like the coffee was, and I'm sure still is. Once the cleans is over I'll add honey to my tea, but if that doesn't help, it's back to coffee I go, knowing that I will be it's slave forever if that happens.

And bread. Though all the Clean book's discussion of wheat and sugars have turned me off of bread, I think I'm going to expand my horizons and make more of my own with some alternative ingredients. I love bread. And if there's one thing I like about cooking, it's the ability to experiment. I'm sure I can find a brown rice bread, or another acceptable grain to use instead of wheat. And if they don't cut the mustard, I'll make my own crusty, soft white bread, or my beloved Irish soda bread. These breads have just 4 ingredients. Maybe I can substitute grains and buttermilk and come up with a healthier alternative. But I just can't live without bread.

I haven't craved anything else, except maybe some chocolate. That I can handle with the organics at the co-op. I don't see how a little dark chocolate here and there is a bad thing, right?